All in a day's work.

I've been filling out military forms for the new GI Bill transferability thing. And I must say, the military always using the lowest bidder for website design just sucks. Could that damn form be any more difficult?? Yes it could be, thank goodness it isn't. I have a feeling this works in their favor. I'm sure others have gotten so frustrated and decided not to seek free benefits. Not me. I'm powering through.

We're also searching for a new sitter/nanny. Nothing is going our way. Instead of freaking out and giving myself a migraine, I'm going to empower "The Secret". Let me just visualize the perfect sitter arriving every day and let's watch it happen. While I'm at it, I'll also visualize a free education. Why not, right. The author says the universe is just waiting for me to do this.

Living with an old dog tests my patience every hour. I say every hour because that's how often I let him out to the bathroom. This is Jas's dog. He's about 11-12 years old and as senile as they come. Did I mention he's a wiener dog?? Cute, loyal, dumb as a rock, great with the kids, and known to be stubborn on purpose. Here's an example: Due to the mess little Goose makes, Jas solved the problem by crating him all day except for bathroom breaks. So, Goo repaid me (not quite fair) by doing his thing in the crate. Was Jas home to clean the crate?? Nope. I repaid Goose with a trip to the vet to see if they could A)fix the problem with medication; or B) let him 'forever sleep'. Ultimately Goose won because the vet thinks we just need to spend more time with him. In turn, I put a crate in Jas's office so HE can spend time with his dog. That last grand idea of mine lasted a whole 2 days. Goose and I are back to hourly outdoor visits and I'm constantly cooing his good behavior. Goose and I have been in this vicious cycle before. He wins me back over and then while we have a playgroup at the house, he poops under the train table. It's truly a love/hate thing with Goo.

The greatest feeling this week... our master bathroom (mold central) still works and is mold-free. On the flip side (because there is always a flip side with us), the outlets near and inside the bathroom emit a burning smell if you're silly enough to use them to dry your hair. Again, I'm so glad we did not buy this big ass money pit.

The kids are thriving. Baby Al finally packed on weight and eats everything in sight. She runs to the fridge and says, 'EAT, FOOD'. Seeing this makes me happy.

We made a difficult decision to suspend Bug's private speech therapy lessons. I felt he viewed the therapist as a friend and wasn't showing $100 worth of improvement each week. He still attends the free speech therapy through the elementary school near our home. He can now easily say 'v, c, k' words. I don't even have to remind him about tongue placement, he does it all by himself. Again, hearing this makes me so happy.

I guess my motto this week should be, you win some and you lose some. As long as I come out ahead it's a good week.

You be the judge

From Bug's Preschool Teacher:

Week 1:

Upon entering the classroom with his bucket in my hand: "BB needs to carry his own bucket".

FYI- His preschool requires kids to bring buckets. Not the cute little buckets you're thinking of. Big a** mop buckets. Think 10 gallon. They get to decorate them but they are expected to carry them from the car into the school.

Week 2:

During pickup, I was pulled aside and informed that Bug and another boy wouldn't line up after the whistle was blown. They weren't immediately punished therefore they did it again during the next playground time. I was told that if it happened again they would spend playground time in the office. I completely agreed with this punishment. We use the same philosophy at home.

Week 3: I arrived early to preschool for pickup. BB was hanging out alone on the playground looking extremely sad. When the whistle was blown, he lined up but slower than the other kids. I watched the teacher take the shoulder area of his coat and jerk him into line. Not cool in my book.

During the ride home, he said he got in trouble 3 times for not using 'pretzel legs' (Indian style seating).

Week 4: Upon dropping BB off at class, we were running behind but not late. I carried his bucket inside because I didn't want him to fall with that darn bucket weighing him down. His teacher did not say Good Morning instead said "BB, you need to carry your bucket'.

Yes, we get it. The boy should carry his bucket. Couldn't you say good morning before lecturing? Not cool again in my book.

Obviously I'm keeping a list. I'm so tempted to talk to the director because I feel we're treated differently. I hate to say it's because we aren't members of the church where BB attends preschool. It's been a month and I keep thinking his teacher is having a bad day... every Tuesday and Thursday it seems. My plan is to watch the other kids and see if she treats them differently also. Then I'm taking my list and making an appointment with the director. Aren't all kids, hyper or calm viewed the same in the eyes of God? Thought so.

Let's hear it for the birds........

While walking from the car to the house, a bird shat on me. It landed right on my front pants pocket. How does that even happen? I was wearing a jacket. Totally missed my head, glasses, nose, jacket and landed right on my front pocket. I can only venture to guess that it happened this way because I've lost weight.

Yes! CrossFit is the BEST workout ever. It's worth the money. It's worth the industrial looking warehouse turned gym. It's worth suffering through summers with no A/C. It's even worth the pre-workout diarrhea days dreading the intense, damn difficult WOD. I'm so glad I got off that stupid elliptical trainer and joined my CrossFit gym because I am finally getting the results I deserve. And tomorrow is Fight Gone Bad day. I'm so nervous about that workout, the pre-workout diarrhea has already begun.

Hello my friend, hello

Go ahead and use your very best Neil Diamond voice, I dare you.

Facebook claims way too much of my blogger time. It's ridiculous. Well, no more. Now school will claim all of my free time.

Surprise, Surprise...I was offered a Fellowship Grant through Drexel's online school. The grant gives 30% off all classes as long as I am a part-time student. With two kids, I'd have to be superwoman to take more than two classes at a time and do well in them. The kicker just happens to require that I begin this summer. Just thinking about starting so soon gives me IBS. My brain is not ready. But my life is ready. Luckily, we found our nanny early and she 'fits' in our home quite nicely. Bug has been enrolled in preschool two days a week beginning in September. Combine that with two nanny days and we're set. In theory, I should have plenty of uninterrupted time to devote to school.

What has the child been up to? Thanks to him, I'm almost never embarrassed anymore. Anyone ever have days where you leave the house and check to make sure your pants are on? I do. I thought it would be really embarrassing to look down and lack pants. Turns out, after life with Bug that wouldn't be so embarrassing after all. Now we've entered the tooting stage. He can toot on demand and he does. In elevators, on benches while some poor random soul is inserting the child's foot in a pair of shoes, in Ikea while a sweet little lady is commenting on his cuteness, and during any other time where tooting would be inappropriate.

Random Bug comments:

Walking through an orchard after picking strawberries:

Bug: Mom, you have a big ole wien in your butt.

Me: (Looking stricken and very pale all of a sudden.)

Bug: I'm just kiddin', it's your camera.

Me: (Technically, the camera was in my back pocket.)

Jas yelling at Bug to go to his room because he was tormenting his sister.

Bug: I'm not scared of you. (As he sprints to his room.)

In the grocery store an older women is checking out produce:

Bug: Hey! Have you seen our baby? Isn't she cute?

At the diner after being seated:

Bug: See our baby? Hey, did you see our baby???!!!!

Talking to my mom (his momo) on the phone:

Bug: See our baby? She's so cute.

Thank goodness he loves his sister.

After knocking Alice to the floor and stealing her toy causing her to scream bloody murder...

Me: Go To Your Room.

Bug: How bout I kiss Alice and say sorry 3 times?

Me: Try it.

Alice: (Immediately soothed.)

On our way to a short errand Bug packed his backpack full of toys.

Alice: (Begins screaming in the car)

Bug: (Opens his bag of goodies and passes her a toy) Here you go Allie. Don't pie (cry).

Me: Did you bring any toys for you?

Bug: Nope. I didn't want her to pie in the car.

Me = melting heart.

Life is good.

Please pick me. PICK ME!

A few weeks ago I applied to Drexel's information and library services master's program. I've been so nervous awaiting their response. At first, I believed my friends and family when they said I would get in without any problems. After the boosted ego went back to its normal state, I started to fret. Why would they pick me? I don't even have library experience. I just know it's what I want to do. Why would they allow me of all people to skip taking the GRE?? 

I only applied to one school. Drexel. Their program is completely online. They offer four different areas of study for the library services degree. They also allow applicants to skip the GRE if your previous GPA is above a certain number. Which is all perfect for me! I don't want to take the damn GRE. It's hard and I'm way out of practice on mathematics. Basically, all of my eggs were in one basket. 

It paid off! They sent an acceptance email last night. I'm in. Yahtzee!!!!!!!!!!!

What did I do after calling my family and closest friends to share the news? Realized I've got to study my arse off and ended up chewing all of my fingernails off. Lovely.

Talk to the hand

Yesterday I took the kids to the gym so they could play in the playground for a while. Before going inside I asked Bug our number 1 rule. He said, "No thumbs in my mouth". Yes! (He's a thumbsucker and we have picked up some nasty germs over the years.) There were lots of kids at the club so I knew they would have a great time. I worked out for an hour and came back to pick the kiddos up. I caught Bug slurping down some kid's bottled water. It seems we need to add a rule.

After our lunch, Bug held up his hand and told me to talk to his hand. I grabbed his hand and began a conversation. Then he asked me to talk to his ear. So I did. It wasn't until I reiterated all of this to Jas that I realized some girl probably held up her hand and told Bug to 'talk to the hand'. I imagine my son did what I did, grabbed the hand and began a conversation. After laughing each time I recounted the story to my mom and my sister I also felt a little bit like we failed the first of many 'cool' tests. Ah well, I wasn't cool until I embraced my inner nerd. Bug will probably be the same way.

In case you didn't know.

These are just a couple of things someone in my house did not know.

If blueberry oats x 3 is on the Trader Joe's grocery list - don't be fooled. A blue box does not mean there are blueberry oats inside. And now, I have three boxes of plain ole boring oatmeal to eat on for breakfast. I'm sure he just had my heart in mind.

The wine opener only looks like a wine opener when it's in my hand. Some people can open a drawer several times and stare at the wine opener BUT it just doesn't look like one until I pull it out.

Showers do not magically clean themselves. Really, they don't. Trust me.

I just love extra long weekends. We learn so much about one another.

Same old

There's nothing new happening in my life this week. Nothing has exploded, nothing broken, no embarrassing moments to speak of. Is this how normal people feel? It's nice.

We've been going to the gym every day. My goal has been to lose weight of course, tone up but also to make the gym my second home. I want to feel as comfy in the weight room with the boys as I do in the cardio room. I thought it would be a difficult task since hulky men seem to rule those weight rooms and girls just avoid the area. I'm okay in there. Now I haven't stepped up to the 'real' weight room yet. But I have made the weight machines part of my daily workout. I ignore the lingering looks the muscle-y boys like to give out in hopes of scaring the girls away. I think after birthing two babies, I'm stronger. It's such a mental game isn't it?

Speaking of mental-ness...the locker room scares the hell out of me. I use the locker room closest to the door. I chose this one because of the minimal naked factor. For the past two weeks, this has been a mostly clothed area. Keep in mind, I know naked-ness is going to happen in the locker room. Why oh why does naked-ness have to be shoved right in my face though??? Why? Why would anyone sit on a bench in my locker room without a towel between rump and bench?? Why does this have to occur right where I placed my purse, iphone, ear buds and keys yesterday???? Why? I hate to have to go all second grade on these women, but gross. I'd almost rather run from a poop stick. Now everything that touches the bench gets wiped with antibacterial wipes.

The kids enjoy the kids club area. Bug plays hard for the entire time. He doesn't even stop for a drink of water. We've met a couple of rude little kids and he's used a few phrases I don't approve of, but he's having fun and that's what matters. Al has finally given her baby thumbs up and decided to try napping in the baby area. She loves the spanish speaking grandmas who care for the babies. Who knows, maybe Al will pick up a little spanish while she's there.

The best part...I've already noticed a slight (ever so slight) uplift in the buttocks area. Yay!!!

Three weeks in review

March 28th - had a baby.

March 31 - home from hospital.

March 31 - April 5 - In laws living with us to help with Bug and baby. Yay!

April 5 - 11 - Sister and grandparents drove down from MO to help with Bug and baby. Yay! I was still recuperating but feeling well enough to have lunch with my sis and do a little shopping. Double yay!

April 11- 17 - Mom flew in from MO to help with Bug and baby. Yay! Yay! I felt much better and went to the Fish House for lunch where we celebrated baby's birth with a bottle of Conundrum. So much for not drinking for a while after birthing a baby. I'm fickle. We also shopped a LOT.

April 18 - May 1 - In-laws are on their way over to help with Bug and baby. I'm exhausted from my visitors. I think I was supposed to rest instead of shop. Birthing babies can't slow down a die hard shopping girl.

In the chaos of visitors Bug also came down with a horrendous allergy thing along with pink eye. It's been fun keeping him away from the new baby. It's also been fun washing every single thing he touches.

Is anyone wondering how Bug feels about his new sis? He adores her. If she cries in the car he says, "Don't cry baby A". Then he holds her hand. If she really starts screaming he says, "Shut UP Baby A!!!!". This cracks me up every time.

The newest and best yet Bug phrase...are you ready for this one?

"Suck it Nazi." Yep, you read that correctly. He's actually saying Suck it, yahtzee but yahtzee sounds just like Nazi. He likes to scream this in public just to watch his mama cringe. He learned suck it from his pop and yahtzee from Aunt J. I just keep thinking...and now I have two.

My week in review...

Allergies are kicking my butt right now. I don't know which flowering tree is killing me but I'd like it to stop. The dry tickle in the back of my throat attacks at the worst possible moments. I travel everywhere with water.

I saved a caterpillar. The silly thing built his/her cocoon on my car window. I pulled it off gently with a stick and placed it in a nearby tree. I checked on him/her later and he/she was gone. I hope a bird didn't eat my new friend. Bug loves the 'Very Hungry Caterpillar' book. It would've been fun to show him the cocoon. Oh well.

I attended a JoLo meeting in a torrential downpour. It was at the Museum of Art which is downtown which translates to NO parking with a one mile radius. I had a big ole box of flyers and other things to carry in. Luckily for me, the rain stopped right as I parked my car with a block of the museum. It seemed to be my lucky day. I should've played the lottery but didn't. It was raining again when I left.

As a JoLo (husband's term for Junior League), I have a committment to fulfill this year. I was placed on the Bargain Sale committee. It's a huge garage sale, basically. My job involves all of the pricing/tagging and all signage accompanying pricing/tagging. It's really quite a bit of work. Especially when as a committee, we decided to make life easy on everyone and assign one price for many sale items. Like: all shoes = $2. It's easy for us, easy for people shopping and we hopefully sell most of the stuff. Some JoLo's disagree with our pricing. They think that since they donated these great things, we should charge lots of money for them. Did I mention the proceeds go directly to school grants? Or that this sale has always been a great way for the community to buy nice things at really low prices?? And, the disagreeing parties aren't even on the committee??? AND the great things they think they donated aren't always so great????? I'm sure I'll pay a high price after the sale. Especially if we don't make a ton of money. Don't even get me started on the number of committee members who have dropped out or moved (this week!). IF we pull off this sale, it will be a miracle.

Today, the family drove to Lulu's for lunch. I love Lulu's! It's Jimmy Buffet's 'crazy' sista's restaurant and it's all open air. The food is great, the atmosphere is fun and the music gets ya moving. I had a hankering for fried green tomatoes, fried okra and a cheeseburger in paradise. My arteries may not be happy with my lunch choices but my belly is. Afterward, we shopped at the outlets in Foley. Fun fun. Bug needed some pants that actually reach his ankles. It's sad how fast the boy grows. Starbucks for everyone after a fun filled afternoon of shopping!

Feet are up and I'm now resting.