Hello my friend, hello

Go ahead and use your very best Neil Diamond voice, I dare you.

Facebook claims way too much of my blogger time. It's ridiculous. Well, no more. Now school will claim all of my free time.

Surprise, Surprise...I was offered a Fellowship Grant through Drexel's online school. The grant gives 30% off all classes as long as I am a part-time student. With two kids, I'd have to be superwoman to take more than two classes at a time and do well in them. The kicker just happens to require that I begin this summer. Just thinking about starting so soon gives me IBS. My brain is not ready. But my life is ready. Luckily, we found our nanny early and she 'fits' in our home quite nicely. Bug has been enrolled in preschool two days a week beginning in September. Combine that with two nanny days and we're set. In theory, I should have plenty of uninterrupted time to devote to school.

What has the child been up to? Thanks to him, I'm almost never embarrassed anymore. Anyone ever have days where you leave the house and check to make sure your pants are on? I do. I thought it would be really embarrassing to look down and lack pants. Turns out, after life with Bug that wouldn't be so embarrassing after all. Now we've entered the tooting stage. He can toot on demand and he does. In elevators, on benches while some poor random soul is inserting the child's foot in a pair of shoes, in Ikea while a sweet little lady is commenting on his cuteness, and during any other time where tooting would be inappropriate.

Random Bug comments:

Walking through an orchard after picking strawberries:

Bug: Mom, you have a big ole wien in your butt.

Me: (Looking stricken and very pale all of a sudden.)

Bug: I'm just kiddin', it's your camera.

Me: (Technically, the camera was in my back pocket.)

Jas yelling at Bug to go to his room because he was tormenting his sister.

Bug: I'm not scared of you. (As he sprints to his room.)

In the grocery store an older women is checking out produce:

Bug: Hey! Have you seen our baby? Isn't she cute?

At the diner after being seated:

Bug: See our baby? Hey, did you see our baby???!!!!

Talking to my mom (his momo) on the phone:

Bug: See our baby? She's so cute.

Thank goodness he loves his sister.

After knocking Alice to the floor and stealing her toy causing her to scream bloody murder...

Me: Go To Your Room.

Bug: How bout I kiss Alice and say sorry 3 times?

Me: Try it.

Alice: (Immediately soothed.)

On our way to a short errand Bug packed his backpack full of toys.

Alice: (Begins screaming in the car)

Bug: (Opens his bag of goodies and passes her a toy) Here you go Allie. Don't pie (cry).

Me: Did you bring any toys for you?

Bug: Nope. I didn't want her to pie in the car.

Me = melting heart.

Life is good.

Conquering Fears

Resolutions made this year:

Focus on me.

How I've accomplished this so far:

Hired a nanny.

Dedicated at least three mornings a week to the gym.

Hired a personal trainer.

Applied to a master's program; got accepted; will start in September.

Next steps:

Conquering my fears. 

My fears:

Running - Shin splints, side splitting pain, slamming my feet on pavement. 

Murky water where I can't see the bottom or the big nasty fish lurking beneath the surface.

Scuba diving

Travelling new places alone with children in tow.

How I'm taking control:

This week starting to sprint on the treadmill. If I like it, who knows I might become a runner over time.

I decided to learn to scuba this week. Jas wants to windsurf together but that doesn't interest me in the least. After looking into scuba lessons I found most of the shops do beginner dives in quarries. FEAR QUARRIES!!! My chest closed up just reading about it. I think this fear will take more time to overcome because I'm not jumping into a quarry. Anyone seen 'Gone Baby Gone'? I quarrel with myself on whether or not I'd jump into a quarry to save someone else's child. I'd do it for my own in a heartbeat but I'd have to talk myself into doing it for someone else. 

I'm seriously considering taking the kids on the Metro tomorrow to pick up my sis from the airport. That should count for travelling to new places alone with kids in tow. I hope no one needs a bathroom.

I've been doing some thinking. (Run!!! Get out now!!!!) Jas and I are not happy in our rental house. 

It's older than we initially thought.

If one too many things are plugged in to various outlets, a fuse blows. And blows. And blows. It doesn't even matter if you unplug that one thing. It will blow four to five times resulting in me scurrying down two flights of stairs to reset the fuse box. Anger always ensues. Not to mention the possibility of a FIRE. We hired an electrician to take a look and of course the whole house needs to be rewired. FYI- if you build on to a house, make sure the electrical stuff can handle the add-ons.

We have a pool but will have to pay for a pool fence in order to make it kid safe. Hint: this cost about $2000 in Florida and I'm sure the price is inflated some here in DC. The owners will not pay for this but we can take it with us when we leave. Oh, it will only benefit us if we have a pool again. Otherwise we'll have a random pool fence in the garage.

Carpets are old and need to be replaced. Obviously the owners aren't going to do that. It's a rental. 

So I keep thinking that if we're going to be here for 4 years it makes sense to be happy in your house. Right? We have considered (seriously) looking for a foreclosure home to buy, fix up a bit and then possibly sell or rent when we leave here. There are some great deals out there. -I've been looking nonstop for two days at houses online. I just feel bad for taking advantage of someone else's misfortune. Is that crazy? It's a great time to buy. And I'm a sucker for a great deal. I usually buy shoes or bags but I can make exceptions for houses too. 

Please pick me. PICK ME!

A few weeks ago I applied to Drexel's information and library services master's program. I've been so nervous awaiting their response. At first, I believed my friends and family when they said I would get in without any problems. After the boosted ego went back to its normal state, I started to fret. Why would they pick me? I don't even have library experience. I just know it's what I want to do. Why would they allow me of all people to skip taking the GRE?? 

I only applied to one school. Drexel. Their program is completely online. They offer four different areas of study for the library services degree. They also allow applicants to skip the GRE if your previous GPA is above a certain number. Which is all perfect for me! I don't want to take the damn GRE. It's hard and I'm way out of practice on mathematics. Basically, all of my eggs were in one basket. 

It paid off! They sent an acceptance email last night. I'm in. Yahtzee!!!!!!!!!!!

What did I do after calling my family and closest friends to share the news? Realized I've got to study my arse off and ended up chewing all of my fingernails off. Lovely.

Zingers

Bug has been full of it lately. Here's a list of the zingers I can remember from this week.

Me: Trying to get him buckled in to his seat. "We do this rigamarole every day. Sit still."

Bug: Did you say cinnamon rolls? Yummm, I love cinnamon rolls. 

Bug: I have an idea. A good idea. How bout Aldice and I play a game?

Me: She's too little to play with the games.

Bug: How bout I pour water on her head.

Me: Why would you do that?

Bug: So, she'll grow like a plant and get bigger like me.

After a long car ride home from the gym, Bug could tell I was agitated.

Bug: Good beef mommy. I'm worn out.

Translation: Good grief.

Me while picking up the kids from the gym play area: Hey Bug, who's your new friend?

Bug: This is sock shoe boy.

I have no idea about this one. Unless the kid's name is Joshua - that sounds a little like sock shoe boy. There's also a girl he refers to as purple girl. This sounds a little bit like a couple of superheros or a cartoon, right? Sock Shoe Boy and Purple Girl save the day!

Talk to the hand

Yesterday I took the kids to the gym so they could play in the playground for a while. Before going inside I asked Bug our number 1 rule. He said, "No thumbs in my mouth". Yes! (He's a thumbsucker and we have picked up some nasty germs over the years.) There were lots of kids at the club so I knew they would have a great time. I worked out for an hour and came back to pick the kiddos up. I caught Bug slurping down some kid's bottled water. It seems we need to add a rule.

After our lunch, Bug held up his hand and told me to talk to his hand. I grabbed his hand and began a conversation. Then he asked me to talk to his ear. So I did. It wasn't until I reiterated all of this to Jas that I realized some girl probably held up her hand and told Bug to 'talk to the hand'. I imagine my son did what I did, grabbed the hand and began a conversation. After laughing each time I recounted the story to my mom and my sister I also felt a little bit like we failed the first of many 'cool' tests. Ah well, I wasn't cool until I embraced my inner nerd. Bug will probably be the same way.

In case you didn't know

#1 Moon sand is dangerous. Don't ever EVER accidentally blow any of it in your eye. Bug accidentally blew some in his eye and ended up with abrasions around his eye...from rubbing. He also had extremely red eyes for three days. Moon sand now lives in the garage. We're saving it in case something strange happens to his eyes. It could be necessary in court. You just never know.

#2 If you get fillings from the dentist and they feel slightly high go back for an adjustment. I did not and now feel like I pulled a neck muscle AND have TMJ pain. Serious TMJ pain. In my defense, I thought I pulled a neck muscle. I didn't think the two were related. 

#3 Don't confuse Andy Rooney with Andy Dick. They are two entirely different people.

#4 Life in the kitchen ends when sink plumbing goes down the drain. No cooking, no cleaning, no counter space because of all the cleaners normally living under the sink, and being 'green' goes right down the tubes due to paper plates and plastic cups. 

#5 If the sink craps out and the plumber tells you you can still use the sink, don't. Especially if the plumbing isn't attached to the sink. Really, REALLY don't turn on the disposal. It's messy. And just plain gross.